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Gaffer

One of Shining Armor's friends at Canterlot Academy. His cutie mark is an 8-sided die and he has a two-color coat. He, in conjunction with 8-Bit and Poindexter, helped Shining Armor hook up with Cadance. They have grown apart over time, only occasionally meeting to play their Pen&Paper roleplay game called 'Oubliettes&Ogres', a play on the popular 'Dungeons&Dragons'.

Over time, he and 8-Bit has come to dislike his far more successful friend Shining Armor, who married, has adopted a child and become the Emperor of the Crystal Empire after being the Captain of Celestia's Royal Guard for a long time. His self-loathing and his inability to understand why Shining has become so successful in life while he basically remained the same he was all these years ago has lead to a venomous hatred of his former friend.

Story Edit

[Thread 257]

[1] He's playing Uno with 8-bit, Changeling 12, and Screwloose after some discussion about 12 fighting Jetset. 8-bit tells 12 that he doesn't have a chance of actually beating Jetset, topping it off by calling him "Ling-Ling". In response, 12 calls him a racist and makes him skip his turn, an act Screwloose compliments. Gaffer tells 12 not to listen to 8-bit and "if you think you can beat Jetset then Faust be with ya’" before telling Screwloose to draw a four, setting her back and prompting her to call him "the worst kind of soul". He points out that, because she won the last two games, he considers her a threat, to which she responds that she's a bigger threat if she loses. Continuing with that point, she tells 12 that if he does manage to beat Jetset, he's just going to keep coming back for a rematch like he does with changeling 007. Then she tells him to draw a two card, ruining his Uno chance. When 8-bit compliments her no-mercy attitude, she says it's a free-for-all and she's here to win like she always does. Except, as 8-bit points out, when it comes to fighting skyscraper-tall changelings. Which prompts 12 to make him skip his turn again. 8-bit complains, saying Screwloose said she takes no prisoners and it's a free-for-all, but she points out that 12 never took that 'oath'. He calls this out as being "unhealthy" and 12 makes a jab about the amount of cards in his hooves being unhealthy, which amuses Screwloose and sets 8-bit off.

[2] "Hey, Miss Loose?" Screwloose gets irritated at him using that nickname after she keeps telling him not to, saying that someone could misconstrue it and it kinda feels like a passive-aggressive insult from him. Gaffer understands, but points out she gets " all shaky and red-faced if someone calls you by your full name" and calling her "Ms. Screws" seems about as bad, "don't you thinks?" Screwloose tells him she thinks constantly and that she thinks he should let her work. "Don’t you have some scrap metal to cut yourself on?" Gaffers says he did that earlier, "Twelve had to drag 8-Bit to the infirmary." Screwloose only asks if Twelve is ok (a fact Gaffer points out) and gets upset when Gaffer mentions the changeling got a nasty cut after stepping on a broken beaker. But Gaffer quickly adds "then he just came over to you, put his head on your shoulder for a couple minutes, and walked away completely healed." Screwloose calms down and recalls that he did do that and now it makes sense why. Continuing, Gaffer points out that this means she must love Twelve unconditionally since he managed to get love from her without her noticing. Screwloose thinks on this for a while, becoming lost in her thoughts. "Ms. Madmare? Your tail’s wagging really fast." She's brought back to reality and grumbles under her breath. Gaffers asks if se was thinking about Twelve, which prompts her to chuck a scapel in his general direction. It misses since her aim was off and she tells him to get back to work. "I’m not paying you to stand around and spout stupid shit!"  He points out she's not paying him anything.